How to Achieve Work Life Balance for Moms: 3 Exceptional Strategies


Dr. Lara Honos-Webb

Dr. Lara Honos-Webb

Ph.D. and Clinical Psychologist

May 13, 2024

How to Achieve Work Life Balance for Moms: 3 Exceptional Strategies

In the quiet lull of a Saturday afternoon, Shannon finds herself overwhelmed by a sense of boredom as she engages in a prolonged session of playing with dolls with her daughter. She keeps thinking of her other children’s needs and her task to run to the grocery store. Each attempt to gently withdraw is met with her daughter’s inconsolable tears—a scenario that might resonate deeply with many mothers. This vignette captures a common maternal experience, setting the stage for a crucial discussion: the profound impact of a mother’s happiness on her children and its essential role in achieving work life balance for moms.

The Mimetic Nature of Children

The adage “monkey see, monkey do” holds a potent truth in parenting. It underscores an often overlooked philosophy where the actions of parents are mirrored by their children. This mimicry isn’t just limited to immediate behaviors but extends to life attitudes and coping mechanisms. If parents routinely sacrifice their own joy for their children’s immediate happiness, they inadvertently become role models for stress and boredom. While this might seem noble, it begs the question: are we teaching our children to minimize their own needs? Could we use our needs to model setting limits and making requests?

Acknowledging this, the narrative needs a shift. Parents everywhere are recognizing that demonstrating self-care and personal fulfillment is not selfish—it’s essential. This realization should be embraced as a battle cry for parents to start prioritizing their own well-being as a pathway to raising happy, well-adjusted children. The idea is not to be selfish, but to model self-care. Trying to do it all can be a recipe for parental burnout.

Why is Personal Happiness Important for Moms?

mom work life balance

Personal happiness plays a pivotal role in the lives of moms for several reasons, impacting not just their own well-being but also their ability to effectively nurture and manage their families. Here’s a more detailed exploration of why personal happiness is crucial for moms:

1. Enhances Mental and Physical Health

When moms invest in activities that make them happy, whether it’s pursuing a hobby, exercising, or spending time with friends, it significantly boosts their mental health by reducing stress and anxiety. Happier individuals are less likely to suffer from common mental health issues like depression and anxiety, which can be exacerbated by the demands of parenting and professional responsibilities. Furthermore, happiness has been linked to better physical health, including lower blood pressure, better immune function, and a reduced risk of heart disease.

2. Improves Parenting Quality

Happy moms tend to be more patient, attentive, and emotionally available to their children. The emotional state of a parent directly affects their interactions with their children; a happy mom is more likely to create a positive and supportive home environment. Children are highly perceptive and can pick up on their parents’ emotional states, so a genuinely happy mom can foster a sense of security and happiness in her children.

3. Sets a Positive Example for Children

By prioritizing their happiness, moms set a valuable example for their children about the importance of taking care of one’s emotional and psychological well-being. This teaches children from a young age that seeking and maintaining personal happiness is an essential part of life. It also helps them understand the importance of balance and self-care, which are critical skills for their future.

4. Increases Work Efficiency and Satisfaction

Personal happiness can increase productivity and satisfaction at work. Happy individuals are more creative, solve problems more effectively, and manage stress better. For working moms, being happy can lead to better job performance and greater career fulfillment, which in turn contributes to their overall life satisfaction.

5. Strengthens Relationships

A happy mom can contribute more positively to her relationships with her partner, friends, and family. Happiness tends to foster better communication and more meaningful interactions, which can enhance the quality of these relationships. Strong, healthy relationships are essential for a supportive family structure and can help moms manage the demands of parenting and work more effectively.

In essence, personal happiness isn’t just a luxury for moms; it’s a fundamental component of a healthy, balanced, and fulfilling life. It’s critical for moms to recognize and act upon their needs for happiness, as this not only benefits themselves but also their families and all aspects of their lives.

3 Crucial Strategies to Achieve Work Life Balance for Moms

Maria always had a passion for painting, but since becoming a mom, her art supplies had gathered dust in the corner of the garage. One Saturday, feeling the tug of her old hobby, she decided to set up a small artist’s nook in a quiet section of the house. While her children played outside, Maria lost herself in her canvas, her brush strokes rekindling the joy she felt in creating art. Her children, curious about her activity, joined in. The afternoon turned into a family painting session, where laughter and creativity filled the room. Maria realized that pursuing her passion not only brought back her own spark but also introduced her children to the beauty of artistic expression, enhancing her work life balance for moms.

1. Permission Slips for Personal Happiness: Keys to Work Life Balance for Moms

Moving forward, it’s vital to dismantle the guilt associated with pursuing personal interests separate from parenting duties. Here, we introduce a concept that could be a game-changer for many:

Permission Slips for Personal Happiness.

These permissions are not just allowances; they are encouragements to redefine parenting as a role that also honors the individual’s needs and aspirations. Consider these permissions:

  • Permission to Pursue Personal Interests: Whether it involves working, crafting, reading, or any other activity that fulfills you.
  • Permission to Choose Your Work-Life Balance: Whether that means being a stay-at-home mom, a working mom, or something in between.
  • Permission for Mental Health Days: Just as important as sick days, these are essential for emotional and psychological well-being.
  • Permission to Break Rules: Not all societal or familial expectations fit; it’s okay to craft rules that work for your family.

By granting these permissions, mothers can begin to feel liberated from the confining expectations that often come with the role, paving the way for a healthier, more balanced life.

2. Redefining Parenting on Your Terms

You don’t have to feel the guilt surrounding the work/life balance you choose. Recognizing that children thrive most when their primary role models are happy, it becomes clear that a parent’s happiness is not a mere adjunct to her child’s well-being but a central component.

This insight invites parents to view their happiness as an essential factor when making significant life decisions. It’s not just about finding time for self-care; it’s about fundamentally redefining parenting in a way that aligns with personal happiness and fulfillment. This redefinition isn’t a departure from the reverence traditionally held for parenting but an evolution towards a more sustainable, joyful, and authentic expression of it.

3. Claiming Joy in Parenting: A Joyful Approach to Work Life Balance for Moms

Parents are encouraged to claim their happiness as a vital part of their role. This isn’t just about making small adjustments but about embracing a broader transformation where personal fulfillment is seen as compatible with, and essential to, effective parenting. It’s about lighting your own fire, not just for warmth but to illuminate the possibilities that come from embracing joy and contentment in parenting.

In reshaping this narrative, we not only enhance the lives of parents but also set a profound example for the next generation, teaching them to value and seek their own happiness as a fundamental aspect of life. This, perhaps, is the most precious legacy any parent can offer.

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