Just step outside of your comfort zone – That’s it. That’s essentially how to get out of your comfort zone, and this insight alone could fill an entire blog post.
Let’s start with the why.
When you avoid doing scary things, your world gets smaller. Conversely, when you embrace how to get out of your comfort zone by doing things that scare you, your world expands. This isn’t about recklessly pursuing danger but about wisely confronting fears..
Getting comfortable with being outside your comfort zone – even if it’s only a few steps out has the potential to propel you to achieve what now seems unattainable. This could be as small as asking someone for help or as big as having a difficult conversation you’ve been avoiding.
Stepping outside of your comfort zone is its own reward. It’s true that if you keep stepping outside your comfort zone, opportunities will open up as you gain courage to ask for them. It’s true that it prepares you for moments when you have to face uncontrollable events outside your comfort zone.
How can you help your kids with this?
It can be tough as a parent because our own biggest fears often center around our kids. So, it is a good place to start stepping outside your own comfort zones so you can see the costs and benefits of feeling the fear and doing it anyway.
An effective treatment for anxiety is called exposure therapy. In a course I took on exposure therapy, the instructor, psychologist Dr. Dan Kalb, invites clients to lick the bottom of their shoe so they can see it’s not harmful. This extreme example demonstrates the principle of confronting fears directly, though it’s perfectly okay to choose your battles.
Starting small makes sense. For parents, this could be as simple as challenging them to eat a food they avoid. Encourage your child to pick up a new hobby that slightly stretches their comfort zone, like learning a musical instrument or trying a new sport.
Parenting itself is the ultimate exposure therapy for any parent. Whether that’s the first time your teenager drives or you let your child play hockey, parenting involves a lot of white knuckling for the parent too. Sometimes fears do come true, if your child plays hockey or soccer they may get a concussion. Avoiding any risks also has its own risks. You can consider probabilities and do a cost benefit analysis of risk. As an example, I wouldn’t go skydiving not only because I’m afraid of it but also because I wouldn’t enjoy it. It also sounds like a lot of effort, money and time I would rather spend doing other things.
In a way parenting itself is exposure therapy since we may fear more for our kids than ourselves. For more insights on exposure therapy and its benefits, visit this article on Why exposure therapy could beneficial by National Institutes of Health
Embracing the journey outside our comfort zones is less about avoiding fear and more about leaning into it with open arms. Every small step we take into the unknown not only shapes us into braver souls but also sets a sterling example for our children. It’s in these moments of challenge that we truly discover our potential and teach the next generation the value of courage and resilience.
So, let’s encourage one another to take those steps, however tentative, beyond the familiar. Because in the end, life’s richest experiences come from the courage to say yes to the unknown, showing us that growth always lies just beyond the comfort zone.